The Win-Lose Approach to Negotiation

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Negotiation is sometimes seen in terms of ‘getting your own way’, ‘driving a hard bargain’ or ‘beating off the opposition’.  While in the short term bargaining may well achieve the aims for one side, it is also a Win-Lose approach. 

This means that while one side wins the other loses and this outcome may well damage future relationships between the parties.  It also increases the likelihood of relationships breaking down, of people walking out or refusing to deal with the ‘winners’ again and the process ending in a bitter dispute.

Win-Lose bargaining is probably the most familiar form of negotiating that is undertaken.  Individuals decide what they want, then each side takes up an extreme position, such as asking the other side for much more than they expect to get.

Through haggling – the giving and making of concessions – a compromise is reached, and each side’s hope is that this compromise will be in their favor.

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A typical example is haggling over the price of a car:

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“What do you want for it?”

“I couldn’t let it go for under $2,000.”
“I’ll give you $1,000.” 
“You must be joking.”
“Well, $2,000 and that’s my limit.”
“$2000” … “$1,300” … “$1,700” ... “$1,500” … “Done!”

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Both parties need good assertiveness skills to be able to barter or haggle effectively.

 

While this form of bargaining may be acceptable in the used car market, and even expected in some cultures, for most situations it has drawbacks. These drawbacks can have serious consequences if applied to social situations.

 

For example, win-lose negotiation:

• May serve to turn the negotiation into a conflict situation, and can serve to damage any possible long-term relationship.

• Is essentially dishonest – both sides try to hide their real views and mislead the other.

• Reaches a compromise solution which may not have be the best possible outcome – there may have been some other agreement that was not thought of at the time - an outcome that was both possible and would have better served both parties.

• Agreement is less likely to be reached as each side has made a public commitment to a particular position and feels they must defend it, even though they know it to be an extreme position originally.

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While there are times when bargaining is an appropriate means of reaching an agreement, such as when buying a used car, generally a more sensitive approach is preferable. 

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Negotiation concerning other people’s lives is perhaps best dealt with by using an approach which takes into account the effect of the outcome on thoughts, emotions and subsequent relationships. You may find our page on emotional intelligence helpful.

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